Grocery List.

I need to put things back into motion. I need to start exercising my mind so that the motion will go smoother. Less freak outs, less stress, more calm.

TO DO LIST-
Make Goals: Literally write, or in my case, type down these goals, and keep a daily journal as to what you are doing in the present to make these goals happen. Later on, before you know it, when you re-read old entries, you will literally see the change.

Meditate: I used to take a walk every morning by myself just around the neighborhood. I would take in EVERYTHING. It was soooo relaxing. I would notice the small things too, like how everything is perfect in it's own way, nature, and just reflect on life. I need to make this a habit again.

You are what you eat: THIS IS A MUST, not much to say about this that I already don't know.

Pick up a book: I will say this - I've found a new love for reading, I just need to do it more often.

Exercise: This year alone I've been WAY more active and have literally SEEN the results which is good because I was the type of person that I would be on a good run for like say a week, and wouldn't see results right away and just say fuck it. My sister, Tara really helped me out with this. :) She told me the "steps" that I would go through. The last thing we talked about was about results. She told me that YOU won't see it first, others will and she was TOTALLY right. I've been slacking this week due to a total shift change, but I can't let that be such an easy excuse to turn to. I have to WORK around MY SCHEDULES. (Does that make sense?)

Surround yourself with GOOD people: Now THIS is going to be hard. I grew up having a lot of friends, I would have considered myself "popular" at one point. ( Not that it mattered) Now a days, I'm a loner by choice. Some days it's frustrating because I have no one to talk to. (Which is why THIS is a HUGE help) I've become somewhat of a hermit crab, so much that others have noticed and called me out on. I appreciate the friends that DO understand the way I am. We all live different lives, life, itself, is a lot to take in. If we don't speak for a month, that doesn't mean I'm mad at you. I just need to breathe. We can pick up where we left off. There are some that I just distance myself from due to the fact that I don't want to succumb to their lifestyle. I can't kick it 24/7, I don't have the desire/time/money for that. And I don't want to be someone else' crutch. I want those people to understand that they are in those predicaments because they chose that. I want them to quit playing the victim and finally own up. I don't want to be that person and certainly don't want to be around a person like that either. That sounds harsh, but that's life.


( I guess I really am growing up.)

Intervals.

They say two negatives make a positive and I strongly believe in this. One example, being my parents. (I love them to DEATH, just let me make my point, thanks.) Mom: High strung, High stress levels, Temper, temper TEMPER!!! + Dad: Depressed, laid back, usually quite until buttons are pushed then KA-POW! = ME: A depressed mess who isolates herself, but when under high levels of stress can freak the fuck out, but can calm myself down just as quick. Here's the topper- I am fully aware of these mood changes and once aware, can snap out of it. Some would call that bi-polar or other things. I call that the best of both worlds. I am the EXACT mirror of my parents. So, with that being sad, I have the power to change that in an instant.

What I'm getting to is that I'm fine, for now that is. "A positive attitude leads to a positive outcome." Although, the world may seem to crumble around me, I just have to remind myself that I'm made with the best stuff on earth, ( Not Snapple, although that sounds yummy right now) and it's going to take a lot more to tear me apart. I'm my own worst enemy and I've come for the fight.